Conversations With Jean
February 25, 2014
One Year
“Bring me up to date”
“OK, so before I bring you up to date on what happened over the past 2-1/2 weeks, I want to show you the Valentine’s Day card I bought you last year. When the day actually came around you were not in condition for anything like that, and so it just sat around in a drawer for a whole year. When Valentine’s Day came around this year, I remembered it. I looked for it, and found it. So, here it is. ‘Happy, Happy, Valentines Day!’
I miss you. But, I have comfort in my deep belief that you, though not here in the flesh, are still here with me. That your spirit resides in God, and when I talk to Him, you are there. He comes to me every morning, real early. He fills my mind with thoughts and dreams that teach lessons, if you know where to look. You, amazingly, are in a lot of them. So my connection is complete. The completion occurs when I realize why we were put together in the first place. It was in his plan all along. The lessons I learned from you, came from Him, and now that you are not here to show and keep me on the right path, He has taken over directly. So, don’t worry, I will be alright
As you know, sometimes with painful memories, that I love projects and can really get worked up over doing them. That I have, since you rejoined yourself with Him, embarked on a final task in my journey. Actually I started it when you were still here, and I needed to keep myself from being overwhelmed by my role as your helper. In that connection, I actually was grateful that He gave me that chance to return some of the support you gave me when I was messing up our lives, and chasing unworthy rainbows.
Our last years, until you took a downturn, were the greatest fulfillment of any dreams a person could have. We worked and had fun, together, all at the same time. Laughter and Enjoyment are on our grave marker. It sums it up…
So, what I’m doing now is continuing with recording our life (and mine before I met you) in ways that might be more readable and palatable than just a litany of what we did. I joined a writing class for old people at RIT to better my abilities to do just that. It seems to be working. I enjoy it. It has almost become an addiction. I can’t keep away from the laptop. It has become a magnet…
I crack them up in the class with a lot of those Jewish jokes we used to hear when we were on the road. You loved to hear and tell jokes. I even stole your letter to Otto, and revised it slightly for my class. They loved it. This is my way to keep reliving the fun we used to have. Such happy days
Jokes aside, there are deeper reasons for all this writing. In a nutshell, to pass along to those behind us, our kids, their kids, and whoever else might care to listen, the deep truths one learns if he can shut his mouth long enough to listen, and write well enough to pass it along. It has taken me over 88 years to even begin, but I am learning to express metaphorically some of those very truths. Metaphorically, because I sincerely believe that they are reality. The substance of this material world is illusionary and perishable. The metaphor never changes, therefore, it is the real, reality. We can take its lessons with us when we leave this world. Those are the true everlasting treasures. So, if I can structure what I have learned in a palatable fashion, it is my wish that those who follow will be encouraged to read it and become more insightful. To achieve the Amazing Grace of true sight.
Talk to you later…”